Andy Davey“The second chance in life”
VITA’s Andy Davey took the opportunity to chat with ‘Tina’ (a pseudonym on the interviewee’s request) about her background as a refugee from the Balkans. To maintain anonymity, some details have been changed or omitted. Please note this blog contains some potentially distressing details of war.
Tina was born in the Balkan countries of Yugoslavia in south-eastern Europe. Throughout the latter years of Tina’s childhood, she suffered through the turmoil of the Balkan wars (otherwise known as the Yugoslavian wars). The Balkan wars between 1991 and 1999, were some of the deadliest conflicts in Europe since World War 2 and encompassed many war crimes, including genocide, ethnic cleansing, and rape. They also led to one of the largest movements of refugees in European history. This large-scale displacement was especially prominent after major conflicts broke out after the breakup of Yugoslavia, and it was during this time, young 16-year-old Tina was also forced to leave her home.
Tina described her childhood as happy until the war started, even though she was living in a country where many things were unstable, and poverty was high. She remembers the day this terrifying event of war beginning took place. She said, “We experience terrible trauma when we were first asked to leave, and we resisted because we didn’t want to leave everything we had behind us, then the second choice would be either get shot or leave”. She further explained that some young men would refuse to leave their families and would join the army to fight the enemy. One of these men was her 18-year-old brother who joined the army, in what she has described as “The worst day of her life”. She recalls this moment, saying, “I remember saying goodbye and then I just knew that I might never see him again”. Luckily for Tina and her family, they did see him again, after the war. However, he didn’t return unscathed and was severely injured and needed a lot of care and treatment.
Tina recalled the journey of crossing the borders which she named the “Journey of Unknown”. At times her father would narrowly escape being shot, largely due to Tina’s quick thinking. A harrowing event started when they arrived at the border, and all the men had been asked to leave the bus, including her father. This panicking realisation that her father might be taken away led to her jumping into action. She said, “So I came out of the bus, and I begged them to let my father come back into the bus”. This display of courage from Tina had seemed in vain at first, and they proceeded to strike him with their batons. But in some sort of a miracle, they decided to let him re-join his family back on the bus, the other men were not as lucky. She vividly recalls “The course of the journey from the border to the refugee camp and all the mums crying and they were all asking me, how did I manage to get my father back on the bus?”.
She spoke of the emotions she experienced at this time, saying, “The trauma hits you, but you have so much adrenaline, you can’t think of being sad.”
Shortly after this, Tina and her family arrived at the refugee camp where the United Nations had arranged for people to be evacuated to other nations in Europe. Tina was relieved to have arrived at the refugee camp. She describes the camp as being littered with “tents that may not protect us from the cold but it protected us from the bombs”. There would be two families per tent, which in Tina’s case meant 16 people crammed into the small tent, with each family sleeping on opposite sides of the temporary accommodation. They were only given a small number of basic supplies such as bread, cans of tuna and hummus to survive on. There were a few toilets located on the side of the camp but nowhere to wash or bathe. Unfortunately, due to the conditions of the camp, many people developed illnesses such as tuberculosis and other lung-related diseases. However, they felt safe because the United Nations protected the camp, and although conditions were unfavorable, safety was the most important factor to them.
After about a month at the refugee camp, Tina and her family were evacuated to England, which would become their new residence. Tina described how unfamiliar it felt when she arrived, saying, “I came to England with very limited English. I had to learn everything from scratch. I had learned very little geography lessons about England; I didn’t know anything about the city that I was placed”. Now that Tina was in England, she, like many other refugees, was reliving the trauma she had developed as well as from the difficulties that came along with integrating into a new culture.
The integration process was difficult for Tina, like so many other refugees. Tina explained, “There has been times where people have made me feel unwelcome and uncomfortable”. She strongly urges people to think before pointing out differences, as it is often an insecurity and is likely to make refugees feel uncomfortable.
The difficulties and the trauma she had experienced led her to rely heavily on the “support given by healthcare professionals at that time, which included nurses, doctors, psychologists and the support given by the local people of the city.” She elaborated, saying, “It is the lifeline that kept me going and helped me to be the person I am today”. This support along with her own determination, allowed her to move through the education system. She learned english within one year of arriving in England and continued with her education to finishing a degree and masters course. She also worked as an interpreter helping her people to communicate. She believes that education is an essential factor in her development from a survivor to a thriver primarily because of education’s ability to aid integration.
Tina constantly highlighted the importance of integration throughout her story and feels that it can only be achieved when the system, the general public and refugees work together. Although she is thankful for the system that helped her thrive, she also feels it could do more to support refugees and inspire confidence in them to succeed. Equally, she thinks that there should be a responsibility on the general public to help refugees integrate and make refugees feel welcome. Her advice for the refugees looking to settle and make a new home would be, “You have been given a second chance in life, don’t be embarrassed to ask for help. Tell the people that are caring for you, how you’re feeling. Don’t hide your feelings. Don’t hide that you just come from the war. Try to integrate as it is the best way to cope with the trauma”.
Tina hopes that if we can get the system and the general public to work together in unison with refugees and increase support, more refugees can rebuild their lives and contribute to the country that helped them.